So welcome to this months edition of Sucky Movies Anonymous, because its March and March Madness is just around the corner, we opted to do sports movies this month. I felt it was only necessary to do the Might Ducks Trilogy.
Listen, don't get me wrong. I happen to love the Might Ducks films. I own two of the three of them, and they are totally my guilty pleasure sports movie. I mean who doesn't love when those adorable little tykes quack at their teacher, but in retrospect the movies are retarded.
Honestly, a hot-shot lawyer gets arrested for drunk driving and sentence to community service as a hockey coach. Lets count the number of things wrong with this:
- A laywer getting caught drunk driving once would absolutely be able to get himself out of the charges
- It only being his first offense (as far as i remember) would only get his license taken away for a year, under no circumstances would he be giving community service.
- I'm pretty sure those parents would be a little pissed off that their children are being coached by a jack-ass lawyer who breaks the law
Of course the ducks did, because they made a sequel. The former-laywer is now a hockey player in the NHL (having left for the minor leagues at the end of the last movie) but he gets his knee blown out and is forced back home. His old friend manages to finagle the former-laywer as job as the coach of the Hockey team for the Jr. Goodwill games, so he rounds up his old ducks and heads to California. They arrive there and meet a few new players that will be joining their team. The team does well initially but then the former-lawyer turns into a douchebag and the kids all hate him and blah blah blah boring standard kids-sports movie cliche shit. The hockey team then goes out and plays street hockey and gets a renewed love for it. The former-lawyer un-douchebags himself and the team goes on to win the Jr. Goodwill games.
We won't even discuss the 3rd mighty ducks film because it was such a travesty.
The only thing that saves the Might Ducks films from being a total sports movie cliche, is that the acting isn't totally awful. Emilio Estevez (the less druggie-insane of the Sheen-Estevez brothers) plays the lawyer turned coach and a very young cherubic Joshua Jackson (of Dawson's Creek and Fringe fame) plays the lead hockey kid in the movie. Kenan Thompson of All That and SNL fame shows up in the second movie in the perfect goofy part for him. A few of the site gags are pretty humorous to watch, but in general this is the worst kind of recycled movie crap. I suggest watching it next Sunday if you have the time.